In the two SAA meetings which I have attended, there have been a number of individuals talking about being "sober". I think it's a funny way of talking about not acting out, but I can see the reason for stating it that way. From what I've ever seen of alcoholism, the battle is much the same with sexual addiction everyday. If something goes wrong – or maybe even if I want to just feel good about something during the day – I am habituated to dealing with it sexually. That can take the form of looking at pornography, or it can sometimes take the form of doing more with another person.
So, what makes up Compulsive Sexual Behavior (CSB)?
Websites tend to categorize CSB into two parts – Paraphilic and Nonparaphilic. Paraphilic is described as "uncoventional sexual behaviors that are compulsive and consequently devoid of love and intimacy". Examples given of this type of CSB are:
- Pedophilia
- Exhibitionism
- Voyeurism
- Sexual Masochism
- Sexual Sadism
- Transvestic Fetishism
- Frotteurism
Nonparaphilic CSB, on the other hand, is described as "conventional and normative sexual behavior taken to a compulsive extreme". Examples given are:
- Compulsive Cruising and Multiple Partners
- Compulsive Fixation on an Unattainable Partner
- Compulsive Autoeroticism
- Compulsive Multiple Love Relationships
- Compulsive Sexuality in a Relationship
I am guilty of Paraphilic behavior on the counts of exhibitionism and voyeurism (e.g. visiting adult theatres and arcades with a partner or alone). Of Nonparaphilic behavior, I am guilty on all counts during various times during my life.
I think the next step after identifying the compulsive behavior is figuring out ways to avoid and end the behavior all together. In the next post I want to work through ways to do this – not just in the long run, but day to day when temptation is the greatest. I've looked at a webpage from Dr. Phil dealing with compulsive behavior, and will find more between now and then.
